Mom Guilt

I'm like many of you moms out there- absolutely in love with my children. I've heard from many moms who experience mom guilt when they have to be away from their children. Just like those women- I feel it too. Moms tend to put themselves on the back burner in order to respond to their children's needs first. Understandably so, children need a great deal of attention and care. Because of that- we are tired, stressed out and often run into the store for milk in our pajama pants because we just don't have the energy to pull ourselves together. Don't judge.

How do we balance out what our children need and what WE need?

I don't claim to know the answer. 

I've noticed recently that I've started to carve out a little mommy time on Sundays. It used to be right before dinner. The last couple weeks it was when I got up. The time didn't matter. It was the act of going into my bathroom, taking a nice long shower, giving my hair an extra wash and then sitting down and blowing out my hair that mattered. It's not the most exciting routine to tell you about, but it really is exciting for me to do. Sometimes I listen to meditation music or watch a movie I've seen more than a hundred times. Many times I watch educational/inspirational videos on YouTube. The kids used to come barging in, but the last few weeks they've respected that the door was closed and waited patiently for me to come out.

I've come to look forward to my Sunday beauty time. What I've learned is that it's ok to shut the door and get some me time. I'm not ruining their lives by taking an hour or so to pull myself together. In fact- I'm better for it. I'm also aware that I may not get to take the time for myself every week- but the weeks I do, I will try to enjoy it. I suggest you try it. It's ok. It really is ok that we to find a place on the priority list. I'm writing this as much for you... as for myself to remember.

How do you take some "Me" time? I'd love your advice and input on this topic.

Messy Winter Break

I know many of you parents out there can COMPLETELY identify with what it's like to have the kids home for an extended break. I love having them around, no schedule and time to relax.... BUUUUUUTTT the MESS!! Right?

It's so hard to keep up with my three! As soon as one mess is cleaned up... another is made. My kiddos are definitely old enough to clean up after themselves... but they don't. I remember being their ages- and I think my mom would attest to the fact that I didn't clean up after myself either.

Now, I just want to say... sorry mom.

So, aside from becoming a raging lunatic and yelling every time you see a mess.... parents, how do you get your kids to clean up and keep the house clean??  Weigh in!

Drowning in a Sea of Paperwork

This is 1/10th of the end of school year mess I still have going on in my house. PAPER is EVERYWHERE! At the end of the school year the teachers send EVERYTHING home. I mean E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!!!! Every little scrap of paper. Every little workbook. Every ratty notebook. EVERYTHING.

I guess there are some parents out there who want to go through every piece of paper their child wrote on to inspect it for some brilliance--- I'm not one of them! I feel a little guilty saying that- but it's true. I only want to see what's important--- good or bad. The problem is- BECAUSE the teachers sent it home--- I feel the need and obligation to look at every stinkin' thing.... just in case I'm missing something important!!! Is this by design? Is this some cruel test by the teachers to see if I'm paying attention and really care about my children?? Paranoia sets in. What if the teacher sent home a specific list of books to read that apply to my child and my child alone? PRESSURE TO BE A GOOD PARENT IS IMMENSE THESE DAYS FOLKS!

It really is a vicious cycle for me. I gather it up into a neat pile, the kids bring me more "stuff", then the mail comes and I create a second pile for that... and just when I think I'm getting to the bottom of the stack--- I find more... and I keep that to go through at a later date! Then- once it's all gone through- I have the "save pile"--- which basically never gets put away!

You think I would have sorted through everything by now. It has been a few weeks since the kids got out of school for the summer. The fact is- I haven't. It's truly overwhelming. I can say this- I feel the "purge urge" coming on--- and good things come from that.  I just hope and pray I don't throw anything important away!

Camera Error

I take pictures every day. I mean EVERY DAY. I'm one of those people. I just love taking pictures. So imagine my freak-out moment when I got this error. I had just switched from my zoom lens back to my normal lens. I clicked it into place and then I got an error telling me there was a communication error between the lens and the camera.

So, I did what any expert would do when they saw an error. I took off the lens blew into it and put it back on! Come on- you know that's the universal fix it!

Well, it didn't work. I did it again... and no success. I put on another lens. Turned it on and it worked. I took that one off, put the error lens back on-- and NO! I literally said out loud "WHAT THU HECK!".. because that's all I could think to say.

My kids came over to try and help me figure it out.... and my 6, 8 and 10 year olds clearly only caused me more stress as they began to grab and pull and argue over the fact that "I'm helping Mommy!" "NO I'm helping mom!" "I WAS HERE FIRST AND I GET TO HELP HER!"

I called on God to help me... and they all looked at me like "What's wrong? We're HELPING!"

Back to the camera. I just couldn't figure it out. So then I did what most other people would do in the situation.... I put it in the bag, walked away and prayed for the camera gods to fix it.

Guess what???? It worked!! 24 hours later I opened up my camera bag, pulled out my camera, turned it on and the error was gone! I pressed the button, focused and clicked! My prayers were answered! What happened and why remains a mystery. I'm just so thankful its no longer a problem! I really can't live without my camera.

Yah-booo?

Earlier this week a memo was leaked where a human resources manager communicated a directive from Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer that says effective June they will no longer allow people to work remotely from home.

This has shocked many since Mayer just had a baby. Reports even say she's had a nursery built next to her office so she can be near her child. Many women applauded her for breaking that so-called glass ceiling and becoming a CEO of a major company.

She has been on Fortune magazine's annual list of America's 50 Most Powerful Women in Business in 2008, 2009, 2010 and 2011.

Women have looked to her sweet mom-like appearance and said YES! A woman... a mom did it! She's having her cake and eating it too... and maybe one day we can be that powerful too! I can see all the ladies out there cheering her on... dressed in their suits with a slight stain from something breakfastish said with a kid on one hip and briefcase in the other hand. Confession:  I write this with a jelly stain on my new pants.

Heck! Glamor Magazine named her their Woman of the Year in 2009.... but this move? It has baffled many women... and men. Many people saying she is taking us back to another era and hindering a woman's....a parents.... ability to be able to work and care for their child.

Doesn't she know that most of the people who work for her don't make her salary, can't hire help and have come to rely on the flexibility benefit that Yahoo provided? It was a perk... a BIG perk... that made people enjoy working there... I suspect.

What if you are a parent and your child is sick? Now instead of working from home- you must call out sick as well. What about a weather delay to a school? Yep- instead of getting on that conference call from home- you must call out.

Federal law protects time off for new parents-- thank goodness some may say--- since Mayer only took 2 weeks off to recuperate from giving birth. I took 3 months... for all 3 of my children. That's an eternity in TV time- but I love my employer for being supportive and telling me they will miss me but to take my time.

It may be hard to understand her move- but she justifies it by saying "Some of the best decisions and insights come from hallway and cafeteria discussions, meeting new people and impromptu team meetings". She is trying to revolutionize and revive Yahoo- and she wants all great minds to come together. Can you blame her for that? Perhaps one of the best ideas to revive the company is not being presented because the virtual worker doesn't think it's that important.

What do you think? Do you think Yahoo will lose some employees because they just can't afford to work in a traditional job? Or do you think it's a great idea to have all employees under one roof? Weigh in.

Yawn

Sasha Obama was looking so cute at the inauguration- wasn't she? Gotta love the fact that at the end of the day- it's just her dad and she was tired! She was caught yawning during his speech. He will go down in history but to her- he's just dad and she's ready to be doing something different. Too cute. Too funny.

Don't Cross These Parents

Photo: AustinMac

Some Wisconsin parents taught their teenage daughter a lesson after she got "fresh" with them. They took her cell phone away for a week and then stepped into social media history with their next move. They took a series of pictures of themselves in goofy poses--- and posted it on her Facebook page. Her brother took one of the pictures and posted it on Reddit! That has elicited a thousand comments with people weighing in on the move! No word on how the teen feels about this one. What do you think- parental genius or bad move?

Who Influences Your Children

Photo: thefamily.com

Got a play date scheduled for your kids today? A new report suggests that you should really keep an eye on who your children are hanging out with. More specifically the parents of their friends. The UCSD/Harvard University Social Networks Project report found for binge drinking and marijuana use the influence of a friend’s mother is stronger that that of a child’s own mother. When it came to smoking, their own mother and friends' parents had about the same influence over teen behavior.

Wait, you mean all that work as we do as parents can be undone by just one sleepover? I know many of you are saying let's hope not!

Is this new report likely going to lead you to better size up the parents of your child's BFF?